Friday, August 03, 2007

This Is A Bit Horrifying

I have a few Theatre stories to write about next. The first of which is this horrible news that Kelly Osbourne will be making her West-End debut in the musical Chicago.

Now I was thinking that by the looks of the promotional shot for Kelly's welcome that she would be playing Velma Kelly. She is newly svelte and has the poker straight black bob hair style which is sometimes synonymous with the role. However the article that I read states that she will in fact be taking on the role of Mama Morton, the matron of the prison where Velma and Roxie are held.

I have big issues with this whole story because 1) The Brits seem to have a knack for asking untalented young starlet's to play in this musical (first Ashlee Simpson, now this). Secondly, the role of Mama Morton is generally played by busty African American women in their 40's. Thirdly the role calls for someone with a big, booming Broadway style singing voice. Kelly can barely handle singing Papa Don't Preach without the use of synthesizers on her voice.

Why God, Why?!? Kelly starts her seven week run on September 10th at the Cambridge Theatre.

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